(Of course the USA already has a wonderful three-word motto, "E Pluribus Unum," that is, "Out of Many, One."
Mr. Lileks cuts loose:
It was no doubt tendered in good faith, but reading the suggestions is like licking a corroded battery. The latter-day sub-Menckens will always get off the sharpest lines, of course; you can’t draw a laugh with something Grandma might knit on a pillow, and drawing a laugh – or a mirthless snort of appreciation, which counts as a laugh nowadays – is the prime objective. Go on: read. It’s not just a lefty thing; the hard-core Ron Paulites are there as well, luxuriously immersed in simon-pure certainties.Actually, while lots of them are miserable bile-spew, I found some of them quite funny. Here are a few that stuck me:
Hundreds of snippets of derisive snark. You can picture the satisfied little grins on the authors’ faces; you can imagine the whole tableau – the computer (which most people in the world will never touch, let alone use, let alone own) the TV in the corner connected to a network that has channels catering to every taste, the iPod stocked with music hoovered up free of charge without consequence, the fridge stocked with food – the light comes on when you open the door, too, unless it’s burned out, and then you go to the store and get another one; they always have another one. The soft bed, the coffee machine, the well-fed pet, the vast panoply of free information and unfettered opinion flowing 24/7 from the internet. You can drink alcohol without being sentenced to death; you can be a girl alone in a room with a man without earning a public stoning; you can stand up in a room and argue for the candidate of your choice without being arrested; you stand in a society that allows for astonishing amounts of freedom, comfort and opportunity. But.
But. Someone somewhere is a practicing Baptist and someone somewhere else is eating a hamburger larger than you’d prefer, and other people are watching cars go around a track at high speed.
“Land of the six word motto”
That’s MISTER America to you, pal!
Enlightenment scientific rationality meets puritan morality (This is the secret to American exceptionalism! -ED)
“Liberals hate it–must be good.”
Everyone hates US; immigration way up
USA - “That hot girl who ignores you”
“50 states, 2 parties, 1 dollar”
“We are the world’s rich uncle.”
“First to the moon and last”
“Home of Hollywood and New York”
“We don’t need no stinkin’ motto!”
“Politically: Representative democracy. Economically: Chaotic meritocracy.”
“If you live here, you’re home.”
Like Ancient Rome, with flush toilets.
“Luckily, our parents left your country”
When pigs fly, cows are jealous.